Up and Down

They say adoption is a roller coaster ride. This one is the worst roller coaster I can ever imagine then. I had resolved not to call the agency or write after several emails that would make one wonder why we are still working to get our daughter. We have put personal feelings aside and worked hard to get her.
This became the DH job to call or write them. I just learned after we returned home from Vietnam without our daughter that it was better for our whole family if I let him handle it. So last week he was excited that after all the emails a full book of them and contact with the U.S
Embassy several times, our daughters papers were done and they only needed to head down to the region to get the date. Easy right?
We have learned nothing with this is easy and again they did not do as they promised. They have ONE yes ONE staff person for all of Vietnam and he is to busy to get our date 1 year and 9 days later. I know it is far from Hanoi to HCMC but please we have waited so long from referral and your family's your with waited what 6 weeks? I am truly happy for these families but you would think the agency would at least have someone to get the date for all the families who have waited so much longer in the South.
So back to the same no date and no return phone call from the director of our agency. Guess its easier to just let someone else in the agency tell you that they still have NO DATE for you.

Ok something to be thankful for. My kids that are home I know and they are wonderful and I cannot imagine life without them.

Ahhh she is mine

We all worry in adoption about attachment. How long till they know we are mom. I have to say though I know Sierra was not attached from day one she was comfortable. She did not cry and slept through the night. One thing she did was suck her thumb though. Something others think is cute but as an adoptive mom it has a different meaning to me. I noticed it about a month ago and I thought she sucked it because she had to when she was hungry. We have gained over 2 1/2 pounds since home so she is not hungry so why still suck our thumb? This is when it dawned on me attachment. My daughter only sucks her thumb when she is really tired and fighting sleep. I noticed about 1 month ago that she was hardly sucking her thumb, this made me pay attention to when she did. When she is tired and a few times when someone else was holding her.

What my daughter also learned is how to control mom. I have never let my kids cry it out. As teens they are fine and no more spoiled then the rest. They needed me when they cried and I provided. Miss Sierra figured out if she cries mom caves in. Bed time has gotten later and later so what is a mother to do? I now lay down with her and she falls right to sleep. Amazing we are bonded (said with tears in my eyes). This little 7 month old has that sparkle in her eyes when I walk back in a room. That little giggle when she gets her way. Spoiled is ok she is my baby and I am her mom.

Making room

What a wonderful day with my two little ones. I so thought it was going to be long and hard to have no preschool and high school out. We still wake up early but somewhere I found more energy to play and clean up the mess. I wonder why no one invented a bulldozer for the house to clean up after 3 year olds though. It is amazing how many toys he can play with in one day and how many non toys he can make into toys and play with. Right now we are on a search with a flashlight before story time. You wind the flashlight and it works. Did you ever know that a flashlight can fly?

I am wondering how easy it will be with 3 children under 4 though. I did this before but I think it was one over 4 and 2 under :). Ok not by much but wow 3 kids that close together is going to make me skinny (a girl can hope)

So more encouraging news about Mai. She is 15 months old and we last saw her 6 months ago. Not a day goes by that we do not think of her and wish she was in our arms. So we hear it is possible that I may be back in Vietnam. I she will not remember us but with time hopefully she will remember the feeling of being loved again. We saw such changes in the 3 weeks we had her and I hope some of those things grew with her. At 9 months old she had no teeth and we are so sorry we missed her first tooth. Wow I am getting excited that we may actually get to see her again.

Do we buy another crib? What do you do with a 15 month old? Myles slept with us so who knows. Here is Sierra's room which the girls will share. Will have to take a better picture since I added a few things from our trip to Vietnam.

Could it be the heat?

So today we got our fingerprints done. We enter the USCIS office and they first ask for your paper that gives you permission to get fingerprinted. Then they ask you for I.D, this is where you wonder who teaches these people before they are put out to work. I hand the lady my passport, a legal identification. Now you have to know the USCIS, you will not get out of there without someone giving you a problem. This could be the chair you sat in or that you stood and did not sit. But who would think that your U.S Passport is not identification. She wants a drivers license. Easy but I lost my wallet in this house somewhere and have not found the time to look for that wonderful place I put it. She then tells me she wants California identification ummm. You have to just laugh. I have the paper sending me there, have my passport and they want what? Funny was she took the passport in the end but made no sense why it was not good to start.
Then I get home to an email from Faith International, the agency that has kept me waiting 1 year from referral for our daughter. This one says you need to send us a check made out to the USCIS office to get fingerprinted. We will send it to them and they will in turn give you an appointment. Oh then after all this they will send an updated 171H. Now you go figure this could take what 4 weeks at the soonest. What in heavens name happened to M's papers are done and they are trying to get a G and R? Should I ask what year they plain on doing this? So we just learned they have no intentions of giving us our daughter in the near future and the wait continues. ONE YEAR IS NOT ENOUGH....
Now to our regular program station... We have hit summer and it is hot outside. It is now that time of the year to find indoor activities. Some of you do this for winter but with little ones I do this in the afternoon in the summer. Today we made sand pails with foam animals and a mail box/bug catcher. Says hotter tomorrow so any good indoor activities with a 3 1/2 yr old and 7 month old?

What day is it?

Can you believe it is June. June 12th to be exact and one year since we got the referral of our daughter R. One year ago today that we found an email of a precious 3 month old that is now 15 months old and still has no mom. My heart breaks for her and all the time she has missed being hugged, kissed, read to. At times we have given up hope and other times when asked to move on was said NO. Then today a call that says are you still interested. Wonder who reads my letters to the agency saying we would not take our money back. Or the letters that said we would not transfer our file we wanted R. So one year later our baby now 15 months old has clear papers. If everyone would pray that we get a G and R and that we come up with the money to travel we would appreciate it.
RYLEE-ANN we are so much closer to getting you. The last 5 1/2 months have been so hard without you and we have not forgotten you at all.